SPF 7-28-06

mean looking
Originally uploaded by cameradawktor.
Here's my lineup for SPF @ www.randomandodd.com over @ Kristine's website.

Mean Looking: my doggie looks weally weally mean in this photo. actually, we think she got stung by a bee....she like to eat them, yikes!

My weapon: I have two weapons, courage and bravery. my grandfather was a hard man to deal with. i loved him and he loved me, but he alienated a LOT of people in his life. very few of his grandkids came around to see him. we had a specialness to our relationship and i was one of the few who stuck around. don't get me wrong, he wasn't all bad......

he would say off the wall bizarre things about people. mean things, that weren't true. it was scarey to call him on it because he had the habit of telling people to get out of his house and not speaking to them for a year or more. he did it when my dad turned 18, and then he did it again to my dad when i was 5. there were times though, when i'd get a lot of courage, be really brave, and tell him what he said was not true.

this took guts, because i loved my grandpa and i didn't want him to tell me off, to tell me to get out of his house, and there was always the fear that he would. so it wasn't taken lightly to correct him. in fact, i don't think i ever saw anyone do it, i could have been one of the very few.

so those are my weapons, the weapons that help me survive in life's battles, and God only knows i've had a few. it doesn't mean i'm weak, its just that we all have to call upon courage and bravery sometimes, and with my grandfather is one of the places i learned it.
my grandpa my dad my great-grandmotherpraying to the coumpa gods

my hiding place: well, i've never been much of a hider, it's not my in my nature to hide, but i've sure done a lot of it in the last year. hiding isn't a good way to make friends, it's not a good way to keep friends either.

and, maybe i wouldn't call it hiding...perhaps its surviving. i don't know, all i know is that i spend way too much time here. it's much safer to not plan anything, have anybody over, schedule things to take the kids to....than to do all these things and then have to cancel because i am not feeling good.

i need to stop hiding, stop sitting around because i am afraid of disappointing others, but mostly MYSELF!!

so here's where i hide: my room with its viewmy hiding place - my house



LZ Blogger said...

Nice Hide-out! As for the pup... does he ever smile? As for Grandpa... you were sweet to hang in there (don't know that I would have) but that's just me! ~ jb///

Christie said...

happy spf!
I played

Fleur De Lisa said...

What a great view you have there.
I like how you had a story to go along with your weapons picture.

Happy SPF and I Played too.

CameraDawktor said...

thanks everyone!

Teena said...

Your poor puppy :(

I played!

Suzanne R said...

What you write always moves me, CD. Very special SPF. Thanks for stopping by!

Charmed1 said...

Great SPF! Love the story, DH grandfather was like that, I learned to just ignore him. He was a wonderful person and would give you the shirt off his back, but boy never cross him or all "H" would break loose.

Happy SPF, I played.

Writer Mom said...

You'll have to tell me more about your grandfather. He sounds familiar.

As for your hiding place, yeah. That's me. I need to figure out WHY I'm hiding, though. It's not for fear of canceling. Hm. Stuff to mull over today. :)

Debbie said...

I think your doggie is doing the Rock impression with one eyebrow raised. lol I love boxers. Poor baby. I don't know you but I "used" to visit Kevin's blog but he hasn't posted since April! Loved the story about your Grandpa, my Grandmother was like that. But she had a lot to gripe about I guess. My own Grandpa died last month at 94, had all his wits about him until the last week before he died. He also left me his stubborn old beagle. lol

Take care,